Thursday, February 18, 2010

Letters Of Intent

Dear (Ahem) Real Job:
I really like the new position you have settled me in. I like the work. I have no problem doing the work all day, and overtime if need be. With that being said.. do you think you could GIVE me some work to do? Because I would rather not be fired for being on Blogger ALL DAY LONG, if that's all right with you.

Dear Whoever Took My Parking Space:
I left for 10 minutes to get lunch. Pray that I don't find out who you are because walking a mile from my new parking space put me in a really bad mood.

Dear Target:
You didn't really do anything to me, but I just don't want to come in tonight. Do you think I could stay home in bed and you could pay me anyway? That would be fabulous.

Dear Guy Who Sits Behind Me:
I know your real name by the way, but didn't want to broadcast on my blog..... I'm sorry I have been on the phone for the past hour. You see, work doesn't really give me much to do this week so I need to occupy my time, and some of this involves the phone. Don't worry, I'm hoping next week you will hear a little less personal conversation and a little more Lil Wayne wafting over from my ipod while I'm hard at work.

Dear CNN:
So today you have a story that made me just flip out on the inside. Apparently we are now arresting middle school aged children because they are writing on their desks? What has this country come too? I hate that I'm now at the age, (26!!!) where I can say "back in my day," but back in my day? Kids doodled, scribbled, carved, etc on their desks all day long. We wrote on the inside cover of textbooks. We had food fights. And yes, sometimes we got detention or whatever, but arrested??? I cannot believe it has come to this. Please, all you great minds of America, stop pushing and pushing useless rules with dire consequences for CHILDREN. Its unnecessary to arrest a child for doodling on a desk. Talk about a power trip. Are we really spending time and money to station actual police officers at a school to deal with these tiny, minor infractions instead of spending money on GYM CLASS and MUSIC PROGRAMS, and damn it... a HEALTHY SCHOOL LUNCH???? No, please. This would be asking too much.


Will Burke said...

Are they still going easy on young offenders of truly violent crimes?

Rachel said...

Oh yes. Have you heard about Eve Carson? She was the girl who was student body President of UNC, and two guys were walking by her house one night and decided they wanted to rob her and murder her. They made her drive her car to the ATM and took out all her money, and then shot her with a shotgun and left her on the side of the road. A week or so before, they murdered another student at Duke over a cell phone. And they are now whining that the trial can't be in NC because it won't be fair, and the 17 year old cannot be tried for the death penalty because he wasn't 18 when he killed 2 people and all that. But don't worry.. we got the kid who wrote on her desk. All is right with the world. (Sorry, I get really bitter about the justice system sometimes.. lol.)